The LeftEarlies

On December 18, 2019, my younger sister, Tina, decided to leave this lifetime early after a long and brutal battle with mental illness and addiction. The day my Dad called to tell me she was gone was the worst day of my life. So began a journey with no destination. There is no “getting over it," no “closure,” and no “moving on." There is only a new way of being. One in which grief takes up residence. It’s as if you lived alone for a long time and suddenly gained a roommate you're not terribly fond of. A widely used metaphor that kinda nails it. My interactions with this new roommate vary greatly from day to day, the one constant being that it is always there.

I am now a “suicide loss survivor". A term I had never heard before my sister’s passing and one I’m not too keen on. It sounds sterile and awkward. I don’t like it, but I use it when necessary because it is nothing if not accurate. As a suicide loss survivor, I was reluctant to share my experience in my creative work. I felt it had all been written. Over the years, I’ve encountered essays and books about grief that have brought me to my knees; the words resonated with such power. What could I possibly say that hasn’t already been said? And, of course, the answer comes easily if I let it - my experience. My loss. My pain. That’s really what any writer ever has to share.

My first piece of creative work as a suicide loss survivor is a story inspired by Tina’s leaving. During its creation, I had a primal and visceral need to find her. To have one last conversation with her. So I went looking - and encountered The LeftEarlies. The story was on the page in less than a day.

The LeftEarlies is a fantastical, otherworldly story about a young woman who decides to leave this lifetime early and the sister who goes looking for her. 

It was first produced on stage as a one-act play. Several years later, I adapted it into an audio drama. The professional voice actors are accompanied by original music and sound design. The LeftEarlies team created a compelling and unique 40-minute piece of vivid and enchanting storytelling that I’m very proud to share. It was the single most difficult and joyful creative experience of my life.

Below, I discuss the audio drama and the supporting podcasts.

You can listen to The LeftEarlies Audio Drama on all major podcast platforms. Visit the The LeftEarlies landing page for more information and links.